Thursday, March 20, 2014

How to Create your own New Mama Tribe

Before I became a mom I had zero intention of finding "new mom friends." But then I realized how hard it can be to make it through the day without people to share the journey with and started to step outside my comfort zone. Probably more at my husband's urging than my own volition. It was one of the things I dreaded most when I became a new mom. Going to play dates. Little did I know that one of the most beautiful things about being a mom was going to be letting my guard down to let people in who were experiencing this same journey. Extending myself to meet people who I didn't know but would grow to adore and lean on from time to time.

So, here it is.... 

1. Walk your neighborhood.... and stalk people with strollers and baby carriers! I don't really mean stalk them, but you know what I mean. These people clearly are at the same stage of life as you - stop them and say hi!

2. Go to the local library story time. This is how I met almost all the moms in my neighborhood. Shortly thereafter we formed a playgroup.

3. Connect with friends of friends. Ask people in your life to connect you with their other local new mama friends that you can meetup with to see if you jive. Everyone knows someone who has just had a baby.

4. Use meetup! It has been a great resource for new moms to find a local playgroup - just go to and put "baby" and the current year in their search box and you're sure to find a group of moms who have just had babies seeking new friends.

5. Join classes! Swim classes. Music and movement classes. Baby Gymboree classes. AND of course baby sign language classes (wink!) as you'll get a chance to chat with other moms before and after class and find people you have things in common with and surely form new friendships. So many moms have become friends after meeting in my classes and it makes me so happy to see them connect and their children play together LONG after their time in my classes have ended.

Sophia (right) and Aly (left) sign to one another when they play!
Photo credit to Jessica Luongo as shared on our Facebook Page

6. Find a baby wearing group. These women may be the most kind and generous and helpful people I've known. Their purpose is to educate moms on the proper way to wear a baby and often they have a lending library to help you figure out what kind of baby carrier would be ideal for you. There's so many choices and seeing lots of women wear their babies in one place helps you to figure out what would be a good choice for you. Baby wearing was one of my absolute life savers as a new parent.

7. Blog about your experience! I have seen it time and time again in the blogging world. Just being real and open about this transition in your life will connect you to others going through the same thing and you end up with a support system... sometimes just voicing your challenges to the world is cathartic enough to figure out how to learn and grow and turn those challenges into adventures. 

8. My last one is simply "Ask for help." My birth educator taught me one important thing that continues to be a message I pass on. Tell the universe what you want and it will be attracted to you. Say it out loud. And when help is offered, accept it gratefully.

I know lots of mamas on the inter webs will have more ideas! How did you find your circle of support as a new mom?

This post was inspired by my friend Abby with her blog post: 7 Ways to Find Your Circle of Support When Pregnant and Postparum --- which you must go view even if just for the awesome quote image she shares there. 

Joann Woolley is owner and instructor of Sign4Baby in San Diego teaching parents how to communicate with their pre-verbal baby using American Sign Language. With her in depth knowledge of ASL as her first language she takes you beyond just the basics in signing, also filling your parenting tool belt with parenting tips and tricks coupled with signing as a great boundary teaching tool for toddlers. Want to know which signs most parents start with but gets them stuck in the mud? I'll send you that hundred dollar tip for FREE.


  1. This is great Joann! I will be sharing these ideas with many of the new moms I work with.

    1. Abby that is wonderful! Again, I'm so grateful for YOUR post in sparking the ideas here!

  2. I love these ideas! I thought I was going back to work after I had my daughter so I didn't try to find a group right away. I eventually found my meetup group through someone I met at a library story time. My tribe has been invaluable to surviving SAHM life and I've made a few really close friendships. Meeting and making friends as an adult is hard, but being a mom somehow made it easier for me.

    1. You are so right that it is harder to meet and make new friends as an adult - motherhood gives us the perfect excuse to break the ice with other moms!